If you find yourself asking yourself if you’re in a toxic marriage, chances are you’re noticing some red flags surrounding your relationship that are pinpointing it’s either time to get some help or end it altogether. Even if it doesn’t end in separation or divorce, noticing these behaviors is a sign that you may need to seek support to work through these issues. Here are six hallmarks that something needs to change in your marriage:
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Your Partner Is Not Supportive
A lack of support from your spouse can manifest itself in many different ways. Some of these include:
- Showing disinterest when telling them about your feelings
- Not putting in any effort to share household duties, such as caring for your children.
- Taking on the brunt of the emotional work of your relationship without any reciprocation
You Have Trouble Communicating Peacefully
Communication issues can happen in any relationship, and they’re pretty common. However, not communicating at all, picking fights over trivial matters, unwarranted criticisms, and sarcasm are other ways that your partner could be demonstrating poor communication. If you’re not willing to listen to each other, your emotional bond and trust begin to wither away.
There’s Too Much Jealousy Or Envy Present
Jealousy and envy seem like similar concepts, but in the context of marriage, they can mean completely different things. When there’s jealousy, it could be that one spouse is demonstrating sexual interest in another person, or even if there’s a level of emotional intimacy with someone else. This can end up causing issues with commitment and even extra-marital affairs.
On the other hand, marriage envy is when a person feels inferior as a result of their spouse being more successful in areas of their life such as finances, friendships, or physical appearance. Check out BetterHelp to read more about marriage and all its intricacies.
Your Partner Is Exceedingly Controlling
When your partner practices controlling behavior, they could manipulate you, verbally abuse you, or even be passive-aggressive with you. In severe cases, this controlling behavior can escalate into physical abuse as a means of exerting further control over your body and mind.
Other examples of controlling behavior are:
- Constant threats or criticisms
- Constant calls or text messages to know your whereabouts and what you’re doing
- Controlling what you can wear, eat, or who you can see
- Asking for proof of your whereabouts or other outings
Your Partner Disrespects You
Disrespect in a marriage can happen in many different ways. Among them are:
- An unwillingness to engage with your feelings
- Calling you hurtful names
- Using slurs
- Ignoring you completely
These harmful actions can escalate to turning your marriage into an abusive one and put you in a situation where you feel trapped or like your marriage is a chore. These behaviors will also ultimately bleed into other aspects of your lives, such as your social life, parenting, work, and so on.
You’re Not On The Same Page Financially
The majority of the time, money problems lead to divorce in many marriages. Money is a powerful force out in the world, but certainly within a marriage. It can be used to manipulate a spouse emotionally, it can be stolen or hidden, and it can be squandered.
It can especially become a toxic issue if one spouse is financially dependent on the other, making the less stable spouse less likely to leave even if they are being abused. Ultimately, if you are not on the same page about how money is used for your mutual responsibilities in running a household, you will inevitably encounter disagreements and tension about how it should be spent.